Real and Man U were in talks, & now they’ve agreed a fee. £80 million for the Portuguese wimp. All that’s left to do is the plastic douchebag to agree terms with Real and Ladies and Gentlement we have a deal.
Here’s what the Mancs have to say about it:
At the request of Cristiano – [...]

The papers are abuzz with the news that Asshole Ronaldo  may be finally leaving these shores, and taking his whiney ass to Real Madrid. Or not.
As usually we have a massive variety of stories from each of the venerable institutions that form the British press.
The Sun is adamant that he’s on his way, although if [...]

For the sake of everyone, everywhere, let’s hope that this goes through quickly.
According to the Guardian:
Ronaldo’s representatives have … informed the Spanish club last September that he had no intention of remaining in Manchester beyond the end of the current season. It is understood that various pledges were made to ensure the deal happens and [...]

This is the first and last time the plastic one’s name will appear on the site.
In another highly dubious ‘exclusive’, Guillem Balage Dot Com states:
Cristiano Ronaldo has an agreement with the actual president of Real Madrid, to join the Spanish club in the summer of 2009
It’s pretty obvious that the Portuguese douche-bag wants to F-off, [...]